Wednesday, August 10, 2011

An Interview

Today I sat down with myself for an in-depth look into the process of becoming a serious adventurer, philanthropist, and naturist. I wanted to give all our readers a peek behind the "veil" at what it takes for me to get up every day, walk to the bathroom, turn on the light, receive a mild electrical shock from the faulty wiring that terrorizes me on a second-by-second basis, and then look myself in the mirror and say... "GO. EXPLORE."

Pay close attention, I have a lot of information to foist upon the sweaty, unwashed masses.

Q: How long have you been doing this?

A: Doing what?
Q: This. All the hiking and adventuring and such.

A: Oh, right. About... *long pause* 10-12 years I think. Maybe longer. Maybe shorter.

Q: And what is it about this job you love?

A: Well, right off, you're wrong in calling it a "job". I've always felt like this is a duty. A service if you will. To the world at large and especially to ol' mother nature herself.

Q: Don't you feel that's a little... self aggrandizing?

A: I don't know what that means but sure. Sure it's aggrandizing. The earth has designated me one of her caretakers. One of her "rangers". It doesn't get more aggrandizing than that, AmIright?

Q: You seem to have a fairly substantial ego. How did that come to be?

A: Ego? You're missreading "smarts" and the fact that I have a sense of self worth for ego.

Q: No no. You're an egomaniac. It's pretty blatantly obvious.

(at this point I became agitated with the line of questioning I was on with myself and left the room to make some ego waffles. I returned 9 hours later)

A; Where were we?

Q: I was asking how you'd become such a skilled hiker.

A: Right. Well, in the late 1800's my great grandpa, Zeb set out to walk the Appalachian trail from Georgia out to California and

Q*interrupting*: The Appalachian trails runs north to south not South to West.

A: Exactly. So anyway, he was walking that stretch of trail for a good 40 days when he happened upon a beautiful patch of land just north of Kentucky. He planted a flag there and called that place The State of Indiana. When I was born my momma decided to honor him and his state by naming me Indy. So there you go...

Q: That didn't answer my question.

A: What was the question?

Q: How'd you become such a skilled hiker.

A: Trade secret.

Q: You seem to be sort of a secretive man. Why is that?

A: Who's asking?

Q: Yourself?

A: I think I'm losing my mind.

Q: Yep.

The end.

Join us for a series of interviews that will be appearing on the blog through the coming year. Next time we'll sit down with Wildman for some behind-the-scenes information on clamming, treeing, fishing, and hunting.

Information compiled by: Indy

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